I have found myself in a simple, turned complex, conflict with a family member. I am confused and uncertain as to how to patch things up. No matter how hard I try, things get more tangled and stressful. "Oh what a tangled web we weave, when once we practice to deceive!" (Shakespeare?) It does not matter what other deception is taking place. My deception is in trying to hide the truth so that everything would blow over. Unfortunately the tangled web is tightening around me, and I have become the bad guy in all of it.
The one thing I know to be true is that I am willing to lay aside being right so that the relationship can be restored. It is so very hard to do that. It seems that every day I have to beat down the pride in my heart that rises up to say, "I am right!" I do not want to be the bad guy! I want to be right!
The more I pray about it though the more I hear The Holy Spirit guide me to put all that is right aside and let go of the matter. God will take care of it all in His time. I must admit that Jesus did the same for me. He became the "Bad Guy" (sin) for me. He took the weight of all my wrongs and let me go. Was it as hard for Him as it is for me? Maybe. But then, maybe not. He is perfect in love and I have so far to go. His love goes beyond my sin. My love, even for family, goes only as far as the love they give back.
Father in Heaven, forgive my lack of love for my family. Forgive me for not following Your example of sacrifice. You are Love and Forgiveness, and I have received it all from You. You are perfect Love. Thank You for being the "Bad Guy" for me. Help me to be the bad guy for my family and anyone else You call me to die for. Make my sacrifice a testament to YOU and only You. Bring my loved ones and myself closer to You in the process. I trust in You and Your word that promises life to those who will not cling to life. Help me be strong for You.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Monday, March 21, 2011
Bling is Bling
I've been invited to two jewelry parties. I attended one last Saturday and will be present for the next one in a few weeks. Though I don't wear a lot of jewelry, I do have a few items in my bling box that I wear with pride.
I have necklaces, earrings, bracelets, pins, and rings that adorn me, with not only beauty, but sweet memories of special times or special people. Beauty can never reside in gold, silver or colorful stones alone. The beauty of jewlry resides in its story to be or the story that was. The story may begin with the first wearer, but it is written over time with the emotions and revelations evoked.
I treasure some simple stories in hand-me-downs from my Mom. One such treasure is a locket she received from her sister. It carries still the tiny picture of her Dad, my Grandfather. When I became the proud owner of the locket it had a missing link on the chain. It was tied together with a green thread. I kept it there for many years, replacing it only when necessary, fearing it would break and the locket lost. The story? Mom doesn't remember how the chain was broken, but she remembers the love she felt wearing it close to her heart.
I have so many other treasures from women who have passed on their jewelry and its stories to me as well: Moms' Mother-of-Pearl cross she wore on her wedding day, a green broach from a dear friend who said it was one of her family treasures, an ornate bracelet given as a re-gift because she wanted me to have a piece of her heart. I have many others, too long to list them all, but all have been cherished because of the ones who gifted them to me along with their stories.
So, as I peruse the catalogs at the "Bling" shows, I think of all those old tarnished pieces. I see the beautiful new and shining bling and wonder what their stories will be in years to come. Will I buy? Will I wear a new piece with the same pride as the old hand-me-down? Maybe more importantly is to whom can I gift my treasured stories? And just maybe that is what God would want me to do.
My sister gives out pearl necklaces to young women she meets that are struggling with knowing how priceless they are. She shares her story and how God has considered each of us the pearl of great price. Sometimes our stories cost us a great deal. To pass on our stories is a precious gift. To add a bit of bling to our stories brings a smile, don't you think?
Father God, You paid a great price to add each of us to Your priceless and precious collection. You are the one greatest and priceless jewel. It is You with which we should desire to adorn ourselves, but so often we settle for plain old bling. I am sure that You love to see us brighten with the beauty of that which You have made. Thank You. Thank you for giving us rich and beautiful gifts. But help us all to let You shine brighter in our lives so that Your glory may be seen!
I have necklaces, earrings, bracelets, pins, and rings that adorn me, with not only beauty, but sweet memories of special times or special people. Beauty can never reside in gold, silver or colorful stones alone. The beauty of jewlry resides in its story to be or the story that was. The story may begin with the first wearer, but it is written over time with the emotions and revelations evoked.
I treasure some simple stories in hand-me-downs from my Mom. One such treasure is a locket she received from her sister. It carries still the tiny picture of her Dad, my Grandfather. When I became the proud owner of the locket it had a missing link on the chain. It was tied together with a green thread. I kept it there for many years, replacing it only when necessary, fearing it would break and the locket lost. The story? Mom doesn't remember how the chain was broken, but she remembers the love she felt wearing it close to her heart.
I have so many other treasures from women who have passed on their jewelry and its stories to me as well: Moms' Mother-of-Pearl cross she wore on her wedding day, a green broach from a dear friend who said it was one of her family treasures, an ornate bracelet given as a re-gift because she wanted me to have a piece of her heart. I have many others, too long to list them all, but all have been cherished because of the ones who gifted them to me along with their stories.
So, as I peruse the catalogs at the "Bling" shows, I think of all those old tarnished pieces. I see the beautiful new and shining bling and wonder what their stories will be in years to come. Will I buy? Will I wear a new piece with the same pride as the old hand-me-down? Maybe more importantly is to whom can I gift my treasured stories? And just maybe that is what God would want me to do.
My sister gives out pearl necklaces to young women she meets that are struggling with knowing how priceless they are. She shares her story and how God has considered each of us the pearl of great price. Sometimes our stories cost us a great deal. To pass on our stories is a precious gift. To add a bit of bling to our stories brings a smile, don't you think?
Father God, You paid a great price to add each of us to Your priceless and precious collection. You are the one greatest and priceless jewel. It is You with which we should desire to adorn ourselves, but so often we settle for plain old bling. I am sure that You love to see us brighten with the beauty of that which You have made. Thank You. Thank you for giving us rich and beautiful gifts. But help us all to let You shine brighter in our lives so that Your glory may be seen!
Saturday, March 19, 2011
He is Coming Again!
This mornings Bible Study reminded me that I am to be expecting and ready for Jesus to return to earth. He will come in power and glory and we all will see it when it comes. I don't want to be surprised! I don't need to be if I keep watch for the signs.
How do I know I don't need to be surprised? Simeon and Anna were not surprised when Jesus was taken as an infant to the Temple by Joseph and Mary. They were waiting for Him and recognized His coming through the working of the Holy Spirit. (See Luke 2:22-38) Having the Holy Spirit dwell in me, I too can recognize Jesus' coming. The questions I ask myself are: Am I looking for the signs of His coming? Do I expect Him to complete His promise to return?
My life should reflect my belief that Jesus will return. I should be ready to follow the Holy Spirit in all things. I should be studying Gods' word to not just know the signs of his coming but to know Him. I should be doing the work that He has called me to do. I don't know when the Master will return but I know He will. I can't worry over the signs but prepare when I see them. In all of this we have hope. We have a hope that when Jesus returns all things will be made right!
Eternal and True God, you are faithful to Your Word! You gave Your servant, Simeon what You promised. You will fulfill every promise and so I trust You to return and the appointed time. Till then i want my heart to be expecting and seeking. I thank You for reminding me in Your Word to do just that! You are an awesome God and worthy of Praise!
How do I know I don't need to be surprised? Simeon and Anna were not surprised when Jesus was taken as an infant to the Temple by Joseph and Mary. They were waiting for Him and recognized His coming through the working of the Holy Spirit. (See Luke 2:22-38) Having the Holy Spirit dwell in me, I too can recognize Jesus' coming. The questions I ask myself are: Am I looking for the signs of His coming? Do I expect Him to complete His promise to return?
My life should reflect my belief that Jesus will return. I should be ready to follow the Holy Spirit in all things. I should be studying Gods' word to not just know the signs of his coming but to know Him. I should be doing the work that He has called me to do. I don't know when the Master will return but I know He will. I can't worry over the signs but prepare when I see them. In all of this we have hope. We have a hope that when Jesus returns all things will be made right!
Eternal and True God, you are faithful to Your Word! You gave Your servant, Simeon what You promised. You will fulfill every promise and so I trust You to return and the appointed time. Till then i want my heart to be expecting and seeking. I thank You for reminding me in Your Word to do just that! You are an awesome God and worthy of Praise!
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Motives
My husband and I are reading through a devotion book for Lent. "Reliving the Passion" by Walter Wangerin, Jr. goes through Marks' remembrances of the Passion of our Lord Jesus. Mr. Wangerins' insights into the scripture we read are thought provoking. Today we read Mark 14:1b, 10-11 about Judas Iscariot going to the chief priests to betray Jesus. The question raised was, does a motive for a sin make it any less of a sin? Judas' motives are never revealed. If his motives were important wouldn't God have made sure they were included in the Gospel?
My answer to the question was decidedly, "No, good intentions do not change the sin." Unfortunately, I again say one thing and do another. Do I really believe that sin can be lessened when my motives are right? If my actions were to be the response to that question, I would be wholeheartedly agreeing. Sin is sin, but I am quick to make excuses. I want my intent to be weighed along with my thoughts, words, or actions. I can then make my sinful deeds to seem less hurtful. I can also point the finger at others whose actions or words have spurred my motives.
Thinking over these thoughts presented by Mr. Wangerin, reminded of the many times I have made light of my sin because of my good intentions.The truth that is revealed today is that God did not make light of my sin. Jesus paid the full price without excuses. when I stand before the Throne I can lay all my excuses at Jesus feet and still my sin will leave a scar .
Dear Lord Jesus, my Savior and Redeemer of my lost soul, I imagine bowing before You and seeing those scars on Your feet left by my sin. I imagine Your loving hands reaching down and lifting me out of my guilt by the scarred hands that bled for my transgressions. I want to take some of Your pain away so that I don't have to be reminded. But all my excuses will not change what my sin cost You. Forgive me Lord for making light of what You have done for me. Thank You for forgiving my sin and my trying to make excuses too.
My answer to the question was decidedly, "No, good intentions do not change the sin." Unfortunately, I again say one thing and do another. Do I really believe that sin can be lessened when my motives are right? If my actions were to be the response to that question, I would be wholeheartedly agreeing. Sin is sin, but I am quick to make excuses. I want my intent to be weighed along with my thoughts, words, or actions. I can then make my sinful deeds to seem less hurtful. I can also point the finger at others whose actions or words have spurred my motives.
Thinking over these thoughts presented by Mr. Wangerin, reminded of the many times I have made light of my sin because of my good intentions.The truth that is revealed today is that God did not make light of my sin. Jesus paid the full price without excuses. when I stand before the Throne I can lay all my excuses at Jesus feet and still my sin will leave a scar .
Dear Lord Jesus, my Savior and Redeemer of my lost soul, I imagine bowing before You and seeing those scars on Your feet left by my sin. I imagine Your loving hands reaching down and lifting me out of my guilt by the scarred hands that bled for my transgressions. I want to take some of Your pain away so that I don't have to be reminded. But all my excuses will not change what my sin cost You. Forgive me Lord for making light of what You have done for me. Thank You for forgiving my sin and my trying to make excuses too.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Who Do I Believe?
Sometimes I am sure that my thinking gets me in trouble. I over think many situations, relationships, and my own abilities and failures.
I've been dealing with a situation recently that I really want resolved. I do not like being misunderstood. I want to be heard and I want to come to a mutual understanding with the other person involved. But I must admit to myself that it may not happen.
The hardest part about the entire conflict is that the longer the conflict lasts the more I think about my part. I analyze and work it over in my mind again and again. I try my best to be fair and honest but all too often I begin to spiral my way down into a dark hole. I begin to believe only bad about myself. I do not trust my motives or the truth. It is my belief about myself that will change my life for the better or for the worse.
What do I believe about myself? Do I believe the truth or do I believe a lie that seems to right? Do I trust all the things God has put into me, or do I trust the voice I hear in my head that heaps piles of past failures on me? Do I let the lies cloud my thinking? Sadly I must say "yes."
I want to believe in the person that God sees in me. I want to believe the truth He speaks over me, but I don't always believe. The truth I heard today from Beth Moore was that if I am ever going to change my life I must start believing God. I cannot change unless I believe what He says about me. I have to stop the pity party and take time to listen. I remember the times I have listened and changes have been made. Those are good times.
Who do I believe? God or me?
Sovereign God, You speak only truth. You know me inside out. It is You I must believe when I look at myself. You are my mirror. Thank You for revealing the truth to me. Even when the truth hurts, I know it is for my good. Forgive me for the times I believe my own thinking. It can never bring me change. My eyes can only see things as a shadow. Let me hear You speak into my heart and my head so I might believe what is true. Help me to turn away from my own thinking and let Your thoughts become my own.
Thinking about what I am good or not good at is one thing that can get me in trouble fast. It is never good to concentrate to long on yourself.
When I let my thoughts linger over what I do best, I can become prideful and sometimes judgemental of others. If I do something well then I have a hard time learning something new or changing my old ways. When trying to be creative, it is never smart to put yourself into a box and only do the same things over and over. Over thinking my positives can lead to obstacles that keep me from being all I can be.
On the other hand, focusing on my "need to change" habits will lead me down a dark and downward spiral that will halt any productive activity. Thinking about my self in a negative way is selfish and maybe even a cop-out for doing what I know I should do. Yes, I am convinced that my thinking can get me in a pit of quick sand that is hard to escape.
There is one kind of thinking that is always helpful and can lead to a changed life. When my thoughts are in unity with the truth of Gods' Word, I will begin to believe and act on that truth.
I've been dealing with a situation recently that I really want resolved. I do not like being misunderstood. I want to be heard and I want to come to a mutual understanding with the other person involved. But I must admit to myself that it may not happen.
The hardest part about the entire conflict is that the longer the conflict lasts the more I think about my part. I analyze and work it over in my mind again and again. I try my best to be fair and honest but all too often I begin to spiral my way down into a dark hole. I begin to believe only bad about myself. I do not trust my motives or the truth. It is my belief about myself that will change my life for the better or for the worse.
What do I believe about myself? Do I believe the truth or do I believe a lie that seems to right? Do I trust all the things God has put into me, or do I trust the voice I hear in my head that heaps piles of past failures on me? Do I let the lies cloud my thinking? Sadly I must say "yes."
I want to believe in the person that God sees in me. I want to believe the truth He speaks over me, but I don't always believe. The truth I heard today from Beth Moore was that if I am ever going to change my life I must start believing God. I cannot change unless I believe what He says about me. I have to stop the pity party and take time to listen. I remember the times I have listened and changes have been made. Those are good times.
Who do I believe? God or me?
Sovereign God, You speak only truth. You know me inside out. It is You I must believe when I look at myself. You are my mirror. Thank You for revealing the truth to me. Even when the truth hurts, I know it is for my good. Forgive me for the times I believe my own thinking. It can never bring me change. My eyes can only see things as a shadow. Let me hear You speak into my heart and my head so I might believe what is true. Help me to turn away from my own thinking and let Your thoughts become my own.
Thinking about what I am good or not good at is one thing that can get me in trouble fast. It is never good to concentrate to long on yourself.
When I let my thoughts linger over what I do best, I can become prideful and sometimes judgemental of others. If I do something well then I have a hard time learning something new or changing my old ways. When trying to be creative, it is never smart to put yourself into a box and only do the same things over and over. Over thinking my positives can lead to obstacles that keep me from being all I can be.
On the other hand, focusing on my "need to change" habits will lead me down a dark and downward spiral that will halt any productive activity. Thinking about my self in a negative way is selfish and maybe even a cop-out for doing what I know I should do. Yes, I am convinced that my thinking can get me in a pit of quick sand that is hard to escape.
There is one kind of thinking that is always helpful and can lead to a changed life. When my thoughts are in unity with the truth of Gods' Word, I will begin to believe and act on that truth.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Die for Him?
I have made plans for my future. I know the house and neighborhood in which I'd like to live. I know what I'd like to be doing as a career for the next few years and I know what I want my family to be like. Of course all of these dreams are the best I can think of for me and my loved ones. I would never plan a disaster or sickness or dissolved relationship to be a part of my dream.
Today, I was daydreaming about the house I really really want to have. It is not big and fancy, but I love the feeling it gives me when I've walked through the rooms. This house has been on the market for a long time now. It is a little more than we want to pay, but it has also come down in price a little. Our house has not sold yet, either, and so my dream house remains a dream.
My dream may or may not be my Heavenly Fathers' dream for me. He may have other plans. The question that has haunted me today has been: Would I die to my dream in order to have His dream? This question makes me stop. I know God is good and all He does is right, but what if I don't want what He wants for me? What if I don't want to let my dream die?
My desires are deep within me and are so much a part of me that to let them go is a death. There will be mourning and sorrow. But, again, God is good and always right. He loves me and wants the very best for me. Maybe those things are not the best of this world, but they are the best of His heavenly world. Jesus has promised that letting go to my life will give me a greater life. God has promised that joy comes in the morning!
It all boils down to trusting in a good and righteous, loving God. How do I know He has my best interests at heart? I know because of the body wrapped in linen and placed in a tomb to be raised from the dead in three days. Jesus' death, burial and resurrection is my sign that He loves. He is trustworthy. He is Good.
Can I die for Him? Can I lay aside my desires to take His desires as my own? I cannot say it is easy. Over the years I have been tested with the little things in life. Some bigger things are being tested now. All I am sure of is that I do want Gods' best for my life. I may struggle in the dying, but I will do my best to always look into His face for the courage to let go and let Him raise me up!
Dearest Lord Jesus, You died for me. It was an awful, painful death. You suffered for me so that I might have the best You could give. Thank You. I struggle with letting go. I see my dreams and desires as the best for me. I don't want to let you or anyone tell me what I need. But that is wrong. You do know what is best. You will do the right thing if I let You. Help pry my fist open so that I can hold onto Your dreams: the plans that are best for me! I do trust You!
Today, I was daydreaming about the house I really really want to have. It is not big and fancy, but I love the feeling it gives me when I've walked through the rooms. This house has been on the market for a long time now. It is a little more than we want to pay, but it has also come down in price a little. Our house has not sold yet, either, and so my dream house remains a dream.
My dream may or may not be my Heavenly Fathers' dream for me. He may have other plans. The question that has haunted me today has been: Would I die to my dream in order to have His dream? This question makes me stop. I know God is good and all He does is right, but what if I don't want what He wants for me? What if I don't want to let my dream die?
My desires are deep within me and are so much a part of me that to let them go is a death. There will be mourning and sorrow. But, again, God is good and always right. He loves me and wants the very best for me. Maybe those things are not the best of this world, but they are the best of His heavenly world. Jesus has promised that letting go to my life will give me a greater life. God has promised that joy comes in the morning!
It all boils down to trusting in a good and righteous, loving God. How do I know He has my best interests at heart? I know because of the body wrapped in linen and placed in a tomb to be raised from the dead in three days. Jesus' death, burial and resurrection is my sign that He loves. He is trustworthy. He is Good.
Can I die for Him? Can I lay aside my desires to take His desires as my own? I cannot say it is easy. Over the years I have been tested with the little things in life. Some bigger things are being tested now. All I am sure of is that I do want Gods' best for my life. I may struggle in the dying, but I will do my best to always look into His face for the courage to let go and let Him raise me up!
Dearest Lord Jesus, You died for me. It was an awful, painful death. You suffered for me so that I might have the best You could give. Thank You. I struggle with letting go. I see my dreams and desires as the best for me. I don't want to let you or anyone tell me what I need. But that is wrong. You do know what is best. You will do the right thing if I let You. Help pry my fist open so that I can hold onto Your dreams: the plans that are best for me! I do trust You!
Monday, March 14, 2011
The Miracle of Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a God-like quality. It begins with God. We would not know forgiveness if God was never revealed to us through His interaction with people and through His word. His forgiveness of us makes possible our forgiveness of others.
Gods' act of forgiving began with a promise to send a Savior. He, himself, became our Redeemer and removed the remembrace of our sin. Sunday, Pastor John mentioned that Forgiveness is needed when we cannot forget. God forgot our sin when He forgave us. It is an awesome thought to think that God did it all. He did not ask us to pay the price and then we would be forgiven. He is the covenant maker and the covenant keeper.
The process of forgiveness can be a painful journey for the one who has been hurt. God also took a painful journey to rid us of our sin. It is said that forgiveness is not for the one forgiven but the one who forgives, but both are set free in the process of removing the wall of sin. The person forgiven may not know or receive the pardon, but he is no longer bound eternally by the accusations of the one setting him free. The one who pardons another will experience freedom in thoughts and emotions. It may take a very long time or a constant returning to the conscience act of forgiveness to find the freedom but it will come. In it all there is a miracle of new life; a life free from the past and ready to start anew.
The miracle of forgiveness is the intervention of God in our sinful lives. It is a joyous experience to forgive. It is a miracle to be forgiven and made clean.
Savior God, You are a miracle worker! You have taken our sin and made it disappear to the place where even You have forgotten! You set us free to receive Your pardon. You are Good! You have also given us the power and grace to free others when they have hurt us. Forgive us when we hold on to those hurts. Help us to relase our grip on those things that can only bind us to the past. Thank You for supplying all our need when we need to forgive!
Gods' act of forgiving began with a promise to send a Savior. He, himself, became our Redeemer and removed the remembrace of our sin. Sunday, Pastor John mentioned that Forgiveness is needed when we cannot forget. God forgot our sin when He forgave us. It is an awesome thought to think that God did it all. He did not ask us to pay the price and then we would be forgiven. He is the covenant maker and the covenant keeper.
The process of forgiveness can be a painful journey for the one who has been hurt. God also took a painful journey to rid us of our sin. It is said that forgiveness is not for the one forgiven but the one who forgives, but both are set free in the process of removing the wall of sin. The person forgiven may not know or receive the pardon, but he is no longer bound eternally by the accusations of the one setting him free. The one who pardons another will experience freedom in thoughts and emotions. It may take a very long time or a constant returning to the conscience act of forgiveness to find the freedom but it will come. In it all there is a miracle of new life; a life free from the past and ready to start anew.
The miracle of forgiveness is the intervention of God in our sinful lives. It is a joyous experience to forgive. It is a miracle to be forgiven and made clean.
Savior God, You are a miracle worker! You have taken our sin and made it disappear to the place where even You have forgotten! You set us free to receive Your pardon. You are Good! You have also given us the power and grace to free others when they have hurt us. Forgive us when we hold on to those hurts. Help us to relase our grip on those things that can only bind us to the past. Thank You for supplying all our need when we need to forgive!
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