I see broken pieces deep within myself. People close to me have said it can't be true but it is. I not only feel broken, but I am broken. I carry with me broken thoughts, broken emotions, broken health, and broken dreams. As I age, I find more and more that I am broken beyond repair.
This is not to say that I am finished and useless, but only states a fact that is true of how my life is. My broken thoughts, emotions, dreams and health are scars from my sin. I have often moved away from God and His goodness and walked the dangerous path where sin has cracked, bruised and crushed me. It has never been Gods' desire that I should be broken, but He does make my brokenness work to my greater good. You see, He has filled my Spirit with His Holy Spirit and His life. As my shell breaks, He is spilled out and I am renewed and set free to live in Him!
I know it is true that when I am weak He is strong! May I never wander far from His broken heart, the heart I broke when I wanted to do things my way! I want to be free in Him and be safe within the boundaries of His love!
Monday, June 30, 2008
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Good and Bad Choices
It is usually in hindsight that we can determine if our choices were good or bad. Ok, so some of our choices we know are bad from the start. With all the health info, could we ever believe that smoking, being a couch potato, indulging in too much sugar, or eating fatty foods loaded with cholestrol is a good choice for our bodies? Many of us take those chances and make the bad choice to indulge our selfish desires.
Selfishness is nearly always the motivation for making bad choices. We pretend that it won't harm us or we want to be part of a crowd and since it is fun for the moment we choose to take part in the activities that will send ripples of problems our way. The question is, how can we ever make good choices if we are so selfish in our nature? We are selfish. We think about what is the most fun or most comfortable thing to do in any given moment. The answer is to find someone stronger than ourselves to take over our choices. Is that where God comes in? Maybe. At first it is most likely our parents who choose for us. Then we enter a stage where we decide to choose for ourselves. It is only after we make a disaster of our lives that we turn to God and ask Him to help us in the choices we make.
Choice is not having total freedom. Choice will bring us to the bondage of trouble or to the boundaries of freedom.
Selfishness is nearly always the motivation for making bad choices. We pretend that it won't harm us or we want to be part of a crowd and since it is fun for the moment we choose to take part in the activities that will send ripples of problems our way. The question is, how can we ever make good choices if we are so selfish in our nature? We are selfish. We think about what is the most fun or most comfortable thing to do in any given moment. The answer is to find someone stronger than ourselves to take over our choices. Is that where God comes in? Maybe. At first it is most likely our parents who choose for us. Then we enter a stage where we decide to choose for ourselves. It is only after we make a disaster of our lives that we turn to God and ask Him to help us in the choices we make.
Choice is not having total freedom. Choice will bring us to the bondage of trouble or to the boundaries of freedom.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Choices
Each morning I awaken to a day that will be filled with choices I seldom think much about. I choose what to eat, how to exercise my body and what tasks on my "to do" list will be done first. I make choices based on habit as much as a mindful decision like making the bed, brushing my teeth, reading my bible. Reading my bible is a habit? Whoa!
I guess bible reading is a good habit to acquire, but if the words also run through my mind in a habitual form, I surely am not building my relationship with my Heavenly Father, my friend and Savior Jesus, nor my wise guardian Holy Spirit. The best choice is for me to read with the intent to communicate with the One who speaks these words into being. Like St. Augustine said, The Word not only reveals God to me but also reveals who I am in His light. This choice is the only choice I know that brings true change in my life.
Because I believe this, I make a habit of not making a habit of my time with God. I spend time with Him in different places: my bedroom, my couch, my computer room. I use different mediums, the bible and other books, praise tapes and song, internet devotions, and radio and tv programs. Times are varied also: sometimes, late at night and other times in the mid part of my day. In all these ways I listen for His voice. He speaks to me of the truth for which I am searching.
My choice is deeper than the mechanics of my time with my Saving God. I choose to know Him and understand Him so I can fully trust and love Him in all the other choices of my life.
I guess bible reading is a good habit to acquire, but if the words also run through my mind in a habitual form, I surely am not building my relationship with my Heavenly Father, my friend and Savior Jesus, nor my wise guardian Holy Spirit. The best choice is for me to read with the intent to communicate with the One who speaks these words into being. Like St. Augustine said, The Word not only reveals God to me but also reveals who I am in His light. This choice is the only choice I know that brings true change in my life.
Because I believe this, I make a habit of not making a habit of my time with God. I spend time with Him in different places: my bedroom, my couch, my computer room. I use different mediums, the bible and other books, praise tapes and song, internet devotions, and radio and tv programs. Times are varied also: sometimes, late at night and other times in the mid part of my day. In all these ways I listen for His voice. He speaks to me of the truth for which I am searching.
My choice is deeper than the mechanics of my time with my Saving God. I choose to know Him and understand Him so I can fully trust and love Him in all the other choices of my life.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Fireworks
Today begins our firework tent sale. You cannot imagine the hard work that goes into putting out the packages, and set up all the safety needs. My body aches from head to toe!
Is all of the effort worth it? Well, sometimes it is and yet, sometimes I do wonder even though we can vacation with the money earned. The people are wonderful and the patriotic excitement gives me hope for our country. But then I do worry about those who misuse the fireworks and get hurt, sometimes seriously injuring themselves or others.
Please be careful if you use fireworks. Take the time to read the safety materials and be prepared with water buckets and / or hoses. My prayers are always with each of you who celebrate with fireworks, but it never hurts to use common sense!
Is all of the effort worth it? Well, sometimes it is and yet, sometimes I do wonder even though we can vacation with the money earned. The people are wonderful and the patriotic excitement gives me hope for our country. But then I do worry about those who misuse the fireworks and get hurt, sometimes seriously injuring themselves or others.
Please be careful if you use fireworks. Take the time to read the safety materials and be prepared with water buckets and / or hoses. My prayers are always with each of you who celebrate with fireworks, but it never hurts to use common sense!
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Power Words
There are times when I choose my words very carefully. Other times I throw out whatever my mind is thinking. Seldom do I realize the power of my words until long after they were said or written.
Some times the effect of our words can be funny, like when I mispronounce a word or use words that others do not understand. That actually happened to me as a new bride (although it was my husbands word that was misunderstood). I would fix dinner and ask him how it was. He almost always said "Pretty good." He did not use it as an exclamation so I considered it to be only an average meal. So , the next night I would try harder with the same resulting evaluation. I began to feel hurt. I also felt guilty for not being able to please him. It wasn't until I asked where his "Pretty good" fell on a scale of 1 to 10 that I found out his "Pretty good" was my "Excellent!" His words had power over me and my unspoken words also held power over our relationship.
There are other times when my words have been offered with the best of intentions but with harsh consequences. Last Thanksgiving I was busy taking picture of family in various groupings. I called my sister, her husband and my sisters children over for a picture, not knowing that not including my brother-in-laws adult children in this particular picture would create a deep wedge in our relationship. Months later I learned through the grape vine that his avoidance of me was because of that one picture. Though I had next called the rest of the family together the damage was already done. I apologized and we are now back to being buddies. He did not realize what my true intentions were. My words and actions were not intended to hurt. But they did.
I expect power from my words when I pray over and think through them as when I write a letter, article, or poem. Disappointment can seep into my soul when these heartfelt words bring no reaction or just a cursory "How nice." I can also be surprised and taken back when the power of my communication results in an outburst from the other person. The truth communicated is not meant to cause harm or set in motion a tidal wave of events that pour out trouble and confusion and guilt. It is these times, when my heavily mined words are not treasured or looked upon as valuable for understanding, that I consider holding back in the future.
To close off my thoughts from others is dishonest. No, I am not one who speaks out every thought in my head, or insists that people hear and agree with me on every point, but I do like to be allowed my opinion, just like everyone does. If I stay silent, others will think I agree with them even if I don't. If I stay silent I am also not being true to myself. The truth is I must speak out with understanding caution and in love.
When I speak out, I must understand that people may misunderstand my intentions and/or what I've tried to say. I must try to be cautious in laying everything on the line knowing that there may be a ripple that will last a long time if not forever. Of course there should always be hope that the ripple will draw the listeners and those affected to a better place. Above all I should have love in my heart so that the words of truth are spoken in love and for the best of the hearer. This does not mean that the words can't sting or that the listener will perceive the love behind the words, but my heart will be right before God, who knows my intentions.
Above all, the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart should be pleasing to my Lord and my God. With that in proper order, I am free to speak for that is what I have been called to do.
Some times the effect of our words can be funny, like when I mispronounce a word or use words that others do not understand. That actually happened to me as a new bride (although it was my husbands word that was misunderstood). I would fix dinner and ask him how it was. He almost always said "Pretty good." He did not use it as an exclamation so I considered it to be only an average meal. So , the next night I would try harder with the same resulting evaluation. I began to feel hurt. I also felt guilty for not being able to please him. It wasn't until I asked where his "Pretty good" fell on a scale of 1 to 10 that I found out his "Pretty good" was my "Excellent!" His words had power over me and my unspoken words also held power over our relationship.
There are other times when my words have been offered with the best of intentions but with harsh consequences. Last Thanksgiving I was busy taking picture of family in various groupings. I called my sister, her husband and my sisters children over for a picture, not knowing that not including my brother-in-laws adult children in this particular picture would create a deep wedge in our relationship. Months later I learned through the grape vine that his avoidance of me was because of that one picture. Though I had next called the rest of the family together the damage was already done. I apologized and we are now back to being buddies. He did not realize what my true intentions were. My words and actions were not intended to hurt. But they did.
I expect power from my words when I pray over and think through them as when I write a letter, article, or poem. Disappointment can seep into my soul when these heartfelt words bring no reaction or just a cursory "How nice." I can also be surprised and taken back when the power of my communication results in an outburst from the other person. The truth communicated is not meant to cause harm or set in motion a tidal wave of events that pour out trouble and confusion and guilt. It is these times, when my heavily mined words are not treasured or looked upon as valuable for understanding, that I consider holding back in the future.
To close off my thoughts from others is dishonest. No, I am not one who speaks out every thought in my head, or insists that people hear and agree with me on every point, but I do like to be allowed my opinion, just like everyone does. If I stay silent, others will think I agree with them even if I don't. If I stay silent I am also not being true to myself. The truth is I must speak out with understanding caution and in love.
When I speak out, I must understand that people may misunderstand my intentions and/or what I've tried to say. I must try to be cautious in laying everything on the line knowing that there may be a ripple that will last a long time if not forever. Of course there should always be hope that the ripple will draw the listeners and those affected to a better place. Above all I should have love in my heart so that the words of truth are spoken in love and for the best of the hearer. This does not mean that the words can't sting or that the listener will perceive the love behind the words, but my heart will be right before God, who knows my intentions.
Above all, the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart should be pleasing to my Lord and my God. With that in proper order, I am free to speak for that is what I have been called to do.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Colors
Do you have a favorite color? Maybe you choose colors depending on your mood like I do. There are days that are bright and need a yellow top for my outfit, but then other days need my blue or green tops to match my serene or "Blue" mood. I guess it says alot about me that I don't wear black. Never seem to get that depressed!
I love colors! They speak to me about spiritual things, emotions and beauty. Without color my life would be dull. So, today I thank God for letting so many colors and shades and tints be available for me to see, wear, and enjoy.
I don't just mean the colors of the rainbow either. I delight in the various shades of skin colors. I am sometimes awed to see the spectrum of color in which we humans blossom. We are certainly a beautiful garden of color! Reds, yellows, whites, browns, golds, tans, and blacks and everything in between. Our skin, hair and eyes are a mini garden of color that blend with others who grow near us.
Even our personalities shine through with color images. We may be the power red, or the cheery yellow, or the melencholy blues or shrinking violets. All in all God must love color too.
There is beauty in us and around us. I want to allow the Creator of my colors to shine through all I am and do! So, do you have some favorite colors too?
I love colors! They speak to me about spiritual things, emotions and beauty. Without color my life would be dull. So, today I thank God for letting so many colors and shades and tints be available for me to see, wear, and enjoy.
I don't just mean the colors of the rainbow either. I delight in the various shades of skin colors. I am sometimes awed to see the spectrum of color in which we humans blossom. We are certainly a beautiful garden of color! Reds, yellows, whites, browns, golds, tans, and blacks and everything in between. Our skin, hair and eyes are a mini garden of color that blend with others who grow near us.
Even our personalities shine through with color images. We may be the power red, or the cheery yellow, or the melencholy blues or shrinking violets. All in all God must love color too.
There is beauty in us and around us. I want to allow the Creator of my colors to shine through all I am and do! So, do you have some favorite colors too?
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