The delivery room nurse carefully hands over a wrapped bundle and leaves a tired and happy
Mom looking into a tiny face. Mom begins a deliberate search through the blanket looking for
toes and fingers. She sees little dimples and exclaims that they belong to Grandma, and those
long delicate fingers are just like Grandpas'. That mop of red hair comes from Mommy, the
bright blue eyes from Daddy. Every similarity to family members confirms that the child she
holds in her arms belongs to her. Each visitor who takes that tiny one into their arms looks for
something that bears a resemblance to themselves or others on the family tree. They all
belong to one another.
Every change as the child grows is watched carefully for family resemblances. Parents are
surprised when traits spring up, but most are welcomed as a badge of honor from ancestors
remembered. It is amazing to see those connections in our children. These associations
help to strengthen the bonds we share. It is very normal for us to search out in our child those
things with which we can relate. Common bonds provide paths of communication and
understanding. But when we look into those beautiful faces, we should not expect to see a
perfect reflection of ourselves. The combination of puzzle pieces from generations and the
unique measure of personhood from the Creator create a new and singular person.
Children are not mirrors in which we can look and see our past. It is not possible to go back in
time through our children and make right the mistakes we made, or replicate our successes.
Parents who try to see a mirrored reflection of themselves may set a trap for their child to fail in their God-given purpose. When we emphasize only the similarities between us, the child begins to believe that he or she must live up to that image. It is more important to give the child a sense of being who they were created to be, and that is ultimately decided between
them and God.
Children are windows. Looking past physical attributes into their thoughts, feelings, hopes, and dreams parents can perceive a world of possibilities. If we look close enough we may even see the fingerprint of God. It is pure pleasure to watch a child unfold like a blossom that comes from a mysterious seed. We cannot know the final outcome. We can only watch with wonder
as the petals unfold and reveal their beauty. Of course, our job as parents is not to just watch through the window. We are given the task of providing the sunshine of spiritual truth, a steady flow of water for quenching the thirst of curiosity, and lots of fertilizer to feed the body as it grows.
It takes practice and prayer to see a child or any person with the eyes of God. It takes work to discover what makes a person light up. If we can discover the passions others hold we can bring them encouragement. Parenting to find the child's, "way in which he should go," demands becoming a student as well as a teacher for your child.
How do we become a student of our son or daughter? We do our homework. We ask questions, spend quality time with them, and watch and listen. Body language, as well as tone of voice, are just as important as the words they use. Ask them why they chose a certain way of doing something. Try not to make them change because of your preferences before you discover why they behave as they do. Be open to listen to them without interruption. Read their story every day and a pattern will emerge. You will discover those unique pieces of the puzzle that make them who they are.
Father, You are the perfect parent. You do see your image in us, but You also recognize that we, ourselves must find out who You made us to be. Forgive us for living our lives for ourselves and not for You. Thank You for showing us how to parent our children. Let us always run to You for wisdom and gidance for those tough parenting times. We trust You.
Showing posts with label children. Show all posts
Showing posts with label children. Show all posts
Sunday, November 8, 2015
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Grand Review
I grew up in a family that celebrated life in many ways. We, of course, had the mandatory celebrations for birthdays, weddings, graduations and other significant milestones. We also made other occasions a tradition that is celebrated even to this day.
The Colorado State Fair is held in Pueblo, my hometown. The city would have parades to celebrate the event and hopefully draw people into Fair. Every year, for as long as I can remember, our family has been a part of the Kids Day Parade. Every child in our family that would be in Pueblo on the day of the parade, would be dressed up and urged to either ride the home made float or be the muscle to pull or push it down the street. It was just as much fun for the adults as it was for the kids.
The big adult kids worked hard whipping up costumes and decorating wagons, bikes and scooters in accordance with the theme of the parade. Little hands would be urged to help in any way possible and often added more mess to be cleaned up by the parents. We are proud to boast of winning a lot of trophies over the years. Its a family challenge and a family fun time.
Watching a parade is fun too. Spectators automatically become unofficial judges. We look over the entries giving our opinions as to the execution of the theme and following of the rules. I guess we do this in more than just parades. We do it in life as well.
Parents are judged by their children in how they play their role and follow the rules. Grandparents are subjected to those same judgments by adult children and even the grandchildren. We are paraded before a host of other family and friends who think they know what we should do. In my opinion we can still enjoy participating in the roles and rules of guiding the children along life's highway. It takes knowing a few simple roles and rules that really are flexible and freeing. We will look at some of these things in upcoming blogs.
Father God, You are our Creator. You made us to work in different roles according to who You made us to be. You are also the Lawgiver. You decide the good and bad of our thoughts words and actions. We have so often taken Your place and for this we are sorry. Forgive us. Thank You for the joy and excitement of parades! Thank You for giving us many ways to celebrate You. We need You as our just judge. Our parade of life is Your praise!
The Colorado State Fair is held in Pueblo, my hometown. The city would have parades to celebrate the event and hopefully draw people into Fair. Every year, for as long as I can remember, our family has been a part of the Kids Day Parade. Every child in our family that would be in Pueblo on the day of the parade, would be dressed up and urged to either ride the home made float or be the muscle to pull or push it down the street. It was just as much fun for the adults as it was for the kids.
The big adult kids worked hard whipping up costumes and decorating wagons, bikes and scooters in accordance with the theme of the parade. Little hands would be urged to help in any way possible and often added more mess to be cleaned up by the parents. We are proud to boast of winning a lot of trophies over the years. Its a family challenge and a family fun time.
Watching a parade is fun too. Spectators automatically become unofficial judges. We look over the entries giving our opinions as to the execution of the theme and following of the rules. I guess we do this in more than just parades. We do it in life as well.
Parents are judged by their children in how they play their role and follow the rules. Grandparents are subjected to those same judgments by adult children and even the grandchildren. We are paraded before a host of other family and friends who think they know what we should do. In my opinion we can still enjoy participating in the roles and rules of guiding the children along life's highway. It takes knowing a few simple roles and rules that really are flexible and freeing. We will look at some of these things in upcoming blogs.
Father God, You are our Creator. You made us to work in different roles according to who You made us to be. You are also the Lawgiver. You decide the good and bad of our thoughts words and actions. We have so often taken Your place and for this we are sorry. Forgive us. Thank You for the joy and excitement of parades! Thank You for giving us many ways to celebrate You. We need You as our just judge. Our parade of life is Your praise!
Thursday, April 18, 2013
Grandparenting
Grandparents go by many names: Nana, Poppop, Grandma, Grandpa, Granny, Pappy, many others and my favorite, Grommers. We may all have different monikers with our grandchildren but we are all enjoying the blessing of life as a grandparent.
Before my children gave me grandchildren, I heard stories of the amazing feeling that came with that gift. I believed these veterans of life's milestones, but truly had no idea until my first grandlady arrived in a flurry of excitement! What was this surprising wonder I felt? I still cannot describe it, but I do know it was and still is a grand feeling.
Stepping into the role of Grandparent brought new roles and new rules. It also brought new privileges and a new purpose. I stumbled through most of these and have had to learn many lessons about the new position I held. I hope to share some of my insights in the next few blogs. I hope you will follow me and enjoy the stuff that makes someone a Grand Parent!
One thing I am sure of is that my heart longs for the joy John spoke about in his third book and verse four: "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth." 3 John 4 (ESV)I always add "and grandchildren" though I believe that Johns' words are from God (and He has no grands). And, yes, He does have great joy when ALL His children walk in the truth.
Father, You have many children and no grandchildren, yet, it made You happy to give Your children the gift of being a part of future generations. You are wise and loving. You creatively draw us deeper into You through our relationships with our heritage and our children and their children. Forgive us when we run away from the responsibilities and only want the blessings of grandparenting. Thank You for growing our families and growing us when we are in the truth. Author of the Grand life, teach us our roles, rules, privileges and purpose through Your word. We are here to listen and learn.
Before my children gave me grandchildren, I heard stories of the amazing feeling that came with that gift. I believed these veterans of life's milestones, but truly had no idea until my first grandlady arrived in a flurry of excitement! What was this surprising wonder I felt? I still cannot describe it, but I do know it was and still is a grand feeling.
Stepping into the role of Grandparent brought new roles and new rules. It also brought new privileges and a new purpose. I stumbled through most of these and have had to learn many lessons about the new position I held. I hope to share some of my insights in the next few blogs. I hope you will follow me and enjoy the stuff that makes someone a Grand Parent!
One thing I am sure of is that my heart longs for the joy John spoke about in his third book and verse four: "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth." 3 John 4 (ESV)I always add "and grandchildren" though I believe that Johns' words are from God (and He has no grands). And, yes, He does have great joy when ALL His children walk in the truth.
Father, You have many children and no grandchildren, yet, it made You happy to give Your children the gift of being a part of future generations. You are wise and loving. You creatively draw us deeper into You through our relationships with our heritage and our children and their children. Forgive us when we run away from the responsibilities and only want the blessings of grandparenting. Thank You for growing our families and growing us when we are in the truth. Author of the Grand life, teach us our roles, rules, privileges and purpose through Your word. We are here to listen and learn.
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Thanksgiving Freedoms
Many years ago my husband kindly sat me down and gently reprimanded me. I had been complaining about all sorts of things and he lovingly pointed out that I was ungrateful. My complaints were not about him, mind you, but about the things I had or didn't have. I was taken by surprise, but knew that it was true and a change was made in my heart.
This year I have taken the dare to write down 1000 gifts and be thankful for them. Ann Voskamp, in her writings, has revealed the truth about thanksgiving and living minute to minute with a grateful heart. A new change is beginning in me and every day I see things and people more and more as gifts. My heart is full of gratitude for the gift of Ann and her words that seem so timely right now.
Yesterday, I read one of her blogs that listed 6 Reasons Why to Teach Kids to be Grateful the research can only support Scriptural Truth. (Froh, Sefick, Emmons, 2008) I was immediately aware that this is not only truth for children but for everyone. Here is what I read and how I see it work in my life.
1. Better Attitudes - Thanksgiving grows a positive attitude even in the hard soil of challenges, disappointments, or failure.
2. Better Achieve Personal Goals - The discipline of writing down our gifts spills over into life goals and the stream of grateful words becomes a river of life change.
3. Closer Relationships, Greater Happiness - We all need closer relationships and long for greater happiness. Seeing people through the lens of gratitude makes them a happy gift to us that gives joy to our days. People are lovelier and friendlier when we are thankful for their presence in our lives. Being surrounded by a beautiful crowd of people makes us smile, doesn't it?
4. Better Grades - Now it may seem that we as adults are not graded, but we are evaluated by many in our lives. The authority in our lives grade us on many things. Employers evaluate our work, banks and credit card companies watch our performance with money and treat us accordingly. Children watch us closely too.
5. Greater Energy, Attentiveness, Enthusiasm - The start of writing down gifts is like wading in mud, but soon the mud becomes a trickle and then a stream and a river flowing out into the ocean of gifts awaiting for our pleasure and filling our grateful hearts.
6 Greater Sensitivity - Gratitude opens our eyes to the world around us. We see clearly the needs of others and our hands are ready to reach out and help because we know it, too, will be a gift.
Finally the article ends with the consequence of not practicing gratitude. The young people studied showed less satisfaction with their lives. They were more aggressive and took more risks and the list went on. Similarly we adults live in a world of our making, good or bad, depending on our attitude of gratitude.
Today is July 4th and the U.S.A. is celebrating our independence and the blessings of our country. We are a nation that complains way too much, maybe because we have the freedom to do so. I wonder what changes we would see if we became a nation of gratitude? I think it would truly set us free!
Our Father in heaven, You are the author of freedom. You are the Giver of Good gifts! Forgive us for our murmuring and complaining. We fail to see Your good hand in so many things, but You are there working out the good for us. Thank You for my country, Lord. I am blessed to live here by Your choice. Thank You for all of the good people that live with us here. Help us to see the good and work hard to change the bad. Bless America, Father! Bless her with a revolution of thanksgiving!
This year I have taken the dare to write down 1000 gifts and be thankful for them. Ann Voskamp, in her writings, has revealed the truth about thanksgiving and living minute to minute with a grateful heart. A new change is beginning in me and every day I see things and people more and more as gifts. My heart is full of gratitude for the gift of Ann and her words that seem so timely right now.
Yesterday, I read one of her blogs that listed 6 Reasons Why to Teach Kids to be Grateful the research can only support Scriptural Truth. (Froh, Sefick, Emmons, 2008) I was immediately aware that this is not only truth for children but for everyone. Here is what I read and how I see it work in my life.
1. Better Attitudes - Thanksgiving grows a positive attitude even in the hard soil of challenges, disappointments, or failure.
2. Better Achieve Personal Goals - The discipline of writing down our gifts spills over into life goals and the stream of grateful words becomes a river of life change.
3. Closer Relationships, Greater Happiness - We all need closer relationships and long for greater happiness. Seeing people through the lens of gratitude makes them a happy gift to us that gives joy to our days. People are lovelier and friendlier when we are thankful for their presence in our lives. Being surrounded by a beautiful crowd of people makes us smile, doesn't it?
4. Better Grades - Now it may seem that we as adults are not graded, but we are evaluated by many in our lives. The authority in our lives grade us on many things. Employers evaluate our work, banks and credit card companies watch our performance with money and treat us accordingly. Children watch us closely too.
5. Greater Energy, Attentiveness, Enthusiasm - The start of writing down gifts is like wading in mud, but soon the mud becomes a trickle and then a stream and a river flowing out into the ocean of gifts awaiting for our pleasure and filling our grateful hearts.
6 Greater Sensitivity - Gratitude opens our eyes to the world around us. We see clearly the needs of others and our hands are ready to reach out and help because we know it, too, will be a gift.
Finally the article ends with the consequence of not practicing gratitude. The young people studied showed less satisfaction with their lives. They were more aggressive and took more risks and the list went on. Similarly we adults live in a world of our making, good or bad, depending on our attitude of gratitude.
Today is July 4th and the U.S.A. is celebrating our independence and the blessings of our country. We are a nation that complains way too much, maybe because we have the freedom to do so. I wonder what changes we would see if we became a nation of gratitude? I think it would truly set us free!
Our Father in heaven, You are the author of freedom. You are the Giver of Good gifts! Forgive us for our murmuring and complaining. We fail to see Your good hand in so many things, but You are there working out the good for us. Thank You for my country, Lord. I am blessed to live here by Your choice. Thank You for all of the good people that live with us here. Help us to see the good and work hard to change the bad. Bless America, Father! Bless her with a revolution of thanksgiving!
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Proverbs Fourteen
Proverbs 14:4 Where there are no oxen, the manger is clean, but abundant crops come by the strength of the ox.
Where there are no children the house may stay clean. I thought that my house would remain clutter free when my kids were grown. It has not happened for me yet because I care for my Grandmen and Grandladies. Every day I need to pick up books, blocks, balls, puzzles and other miscellaneous toys. There are crumbs on the floor, and spills to wipe up. Sippy cups are in the sink and toddler snacks line my cupbords. Some days I don't mind the mess, but other days, well.....
The mess I deal with day after day is a reminder of the wonderful imaginations and relationships I have with the children I have cared for over the years. Right now I can count at least fifteen children that I have hugged and entertained me daily. My own children, nieces, nephews, grandchildren and others all have been under my feet and in my hair as well as my heart. There have been many more that have come for an hour or two, but still left precious seeds in my life.
What abundant crops are left by the children? They show me God in new and amazing ways. They smile, and I am filled with joy. They cry, and I learn mercy. They explore, and I see the world a new. I reap a rich harvest by allowing those little ones to mess up my life. I am changed by their existence. That is their strength. God has given them the power to change my heart, my world view, and my prideful spirit.
I realize that Solomon may not have had children in mind when writing this proverb, but God has let me see my life in his words. God has made these words come alive to me and I am humbled.
O Lover of Children, You have let me share in the abundance of Your little ones. You welcome them to come close to You. Thank You for letting me share in the abundance of childlike wisdom. Forgive me when I want to push them away because of my weariness or selfishness. Teach me to use their messes as opportunities to humble myself before You. You have wanted me to become as a little child, and these little ones You have sent my way help me to learn that truth. I love You! May I crawl into Your lap and wrap my arms around Your neck and call You Daddy? I want to be Your little girl. I know You will take care of all my messes.
Where there are no children the house may stay clean. I thought that my house would remain clutter free when my kids were grown. It has not happened for me yet because I care for my Grandmen and Grandladies. Every day I need to pick up books, blocks, balls, puzzles and other miscellaneous toys. There are crumbs on the floor, and spills to wipe up. Sippy cups are in the sink and toddler snacks line my cupbords. Some days I don't mind the mess, but other days, well.....
The mess I deal with day after day is a reminder of the wonderful imaginations and relationships I have with the children I have cared for over the years. Right now I can count at least fifteen children that I have hugged and entertained me daily. My own children, nieces, nephews, grandchildren and others all have been under my feet and in my hair as well as my heart. There have been many more that have come for an hour or two, but still left precious seeds in my life.
What abundant crops are left by the children? They show me God in new and amazing ways. They smile, and I am filled with joy. They cry, and I learn mercy. They explore, and I see the world a new. I reap a rich harvest by allowing those little ones to mess up my life. I am changed by their existence. That is their strength. God has given them the power to change my heart, my world view, and my prideful spirit.
I realize that Solomon may not have had children in mind when writing this proverb, but God has let me see my life in his words. God has made these words come alive to me and I am humbled.
O Lover of Children, You have let me share in the abundance of Your little ones. You welcome them to come close to You. Thank You for letting me share in the abundance of childlike wisdom. Forgive me when I want to push them away because of my weariness or selfishness. Teach me to use their messes as opportunities to humble myself before You. You have wanted me to become as a little child, and these little ones You have sent my way help me to learn that truth. I love You! May I crawl into Your lap and wrap my arms around Your neck and call You Daddy? I want to be Your little girl. I know You will take care of all my messes.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Our Father
The opening of the prayer Jesus taught His disciples tells us so very much. In two small words Jesus reveals God's desire for relationship with us.
"Our Father", the prayer begins. Jesus himself prayed this for the disciples. His use of the pronoun "Our" tells us a few important things to remember. First, we are not "only" children. We have brothers and sisters. We belong to a very large family. Secondly, our Big Brother is Jesus. He is God's first born Son and we are privileged to have Him looking over us. Thirdly, the word our implies ownership. We claim God as our very own Father.
The use of the name "Father" reveals a very intimate connection to God. We are not just the creation but a part of who God is! We are made in His image. He calls us His children.
I have watched my son, David, father his two little boys. David is ready to protect and play, teach and tell stories, discipline and disciple. My husband, too, has been a father my children called when in trouble, and laughed with in the silly times. We don't always see God as that kind of "Daddy." Though He calls me His child, I respond to Him more like He is my boss.
The Father says, "My children." He, too, uses a pronoun of possession. God recognizes our need to be protected and played with, taught and delighted with stories, disciplined and discipled. He is a good Daddy! He invites us to live in an eternal childhood with Him as our Father!
Our Father.
My children.
Beautiful words that make me smile.
Our Father, you are my Daddy. You are the one I can call when I am in trouble or something is broken. You are my shield and protector. You delight me each day with the fun surprises You make for my pleasure. (Like the yellow butterfly at the ball game last Sunday!) I trust You because I am Yours! Thank You for loving me. Thank You for relationship with You and my brothers and sisters in our family. Thank You for my Big Brother Jesus. I am your child, You are my Father!
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Fly Away Home
When children leave home there is much excitement. The change for them is a gigantic step of independence and maturity. I know from experience that at the same time it is also a leap of faith for parents.
Letting go of the child into the adult world is not easy. In fact it takes much courage and strength to let go. Parents have provided, protected, pacified and punished in an effort to make the day of flying away from the nest a successful one for the child. But as their young one drops over the edge of the nest and before the first flutter of their wings catch the wind, a parent forgets to breathe, and remembers every mistake they made. The well taught fledgling seems to never look back.
Children find the place they will call home. It is no longer where the parents live. Home is their own place of comfort and security. Home is a place Mom and Dad visit. It is a place where they can make mistakes and learn to live life fully in charge, making choices and reaping the harvest, good or bad.
Parents know the importance of letting their children fly away home and so they do, with tears. There is a future hope that parent and child will one day share an eternal home. With that hope there is joy. It is never a mistake to give your child wings that leads them to the home that Jesus is preparing for us. In that truth a parent can rejoice!
Little one, with tears I let go, so you can fly away to a place where you can learn who you are and who God can be in your life. Fly away home!
Letting go of the child into the adult world is not easy. In fact it takes much courage and strength to let go. Parents have provided, protected, pacified and punished in an effort to make the day of flying away from the nest a successful one for the child. But as their young one drops over the edge of the nest and before the first flutter of their wings catch the wind, a parent forgets to breathe, and remembers every mistake they made. The well taught fledgling seems to never look back.
Children find the place they will call home. It is no longer where the parents live. Home is their own place of comfort and security. Home is a place Mom and Dad visit. It is a place where they can make mistakes and learn to live life fully in charge, making choices and reaping the harvest, good or bad.
Parents know the importance of letting their children fly away home and so they do, with tears. There is a future hope that parent and child will one day share an eternal home. With that hope there is joy. It is never a mistake to give your child wings that leads them to the home that Jesus is preparing for us. In that truth a parent can rejoice!
Little one, with tears I let go, so you can fly away to a place where you can learn who you are and who God can be in your life. Fly away home!
Monday, September 1, 2008
A Graced Labor Day
I watched my two grandaughters put on a water show for Labor Day. Tricks, jumps, and Shamu splashes brought smiles, laughter, and much praise! It was a delightful show!
We, the audience, were not the only ones to be delighted. Paige and Brooke were delighted to be the focus of our attention. They grinned, laughed and tried to think up more tricks to keep us from calling it a day. Their enthusiasm for celebrating every day can sometimes be tiring, but today it was inviting. They brought us into their fun and even allowed us to do our own "tricks."
Memories were made today. Brooke calling out to Marley, the dog as he ran out to the back yard, "You're free!" Paige running over to baby Scott over and over and asking "How is Scott doing?" Uncle Joe and Momma Erin doing cartwheels with the girls. Pappy touching his nose with each finger as his trick. Grommers touching her toes, and the rest bowing out of the games. Being together was a treat for the heart and a lift for our spirits.
Tomorrow promises to be a day of prayer. It will be a day when our faith will be tested. But today was a day of unity and sunshine and blessing. We will be strong tomorrow because we have had our Labor Day graced with the simple faith of children!
Thank you, Lord, for whatever You bring us tomorrow. You are good all the time and we place our hope and trust in You alone!
We, the audience, were not the only ones to be delighted. Paige and Brooke were delighted to be the focus of our attention. They grinned, laughed and tried to think up more tricks to keep us from calling it a day. Their enthusiasm for celebrating every day can sometimes be tiring, but today it was inviting. They brought us into their fun and even allowed us to do our own "tricks."
Memories were made today. Brooke calling out to Marley, the dog as he ran out to the back yard, "You're free!" Paige running over to baby Scott over and over and asking "How is Scott doing?" Uncle Joe and Momma Erin doing cartwheels with the girls. Pappy touching his nose with each finger as his trick. Grommers touching her toes, and the rest bowing out of the games. Being together was a treat for the heart and a lift for our spirits.
Tomorrow promises to be a day of prayer. It will be a day when our faith will be tested. But today was a day of unity and sunshine and blessing. We will be strong tomorrow because we have had our Labor Day graced with the simple faith of children!
Thank you, Lord, for whatever You bring us tomorrow. You are good all the time and we place our hope and trust in You alone!
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