Friday, May 6, 2011

Imperfect Moms

Mother's Day cards all seem to insist that Moms are perfect. I think we all know better, but Moms sure love to hear that they are perfect for their kids.

Some years ago, one of my daughters, whom I won't name, wanted me to be perfect, but over and over again I failed to meet her expectations. She was in the stage where Mom didn't understand or know that she was so very smart and wise and did not need my limited wisdom to help her become a successful and happy adult.

My heart ached for the choices she was making. She thought she was making good choices but as one by one those choices failed her, I sat in my prayer closet and prayed that all things would work for her good, because she loved the Lord and was called according to His purpose. I am glad to say that none of her choices were permanent heartaches. They were only little bumps in the road to true wisdom.

It was during this time that I wrote a poem expressing the truth about Moms, especially about me. I am including it here and in my Poetry Impressed blog in honor of Mother's Day and for all of us imperfect Moms.

Perfect Mom

I’m not a perfect mom.
How could I ever be,
When four small little ones
Once sat upon my knee?

My arms could hold not one
The same as for the next.
My mouth could speak no perfect words
There was no perfect text.

I could not do the perfect thing
Each special child would need.
I could not be someone I am not
For four such different seeds.

Somewhere in my heart
A perfect love does grow.
It covers all my sins
I hope someday they’ll know.

I am one imperfect mom
Yet try so hard to live
Loving each child perfectly
As much as I can give!

Carolynn J. Scully
©2011 (edited)

Father, You are the perfect creator of mothers. We fail to walk a perfect life and need Your forgiveness as well as forgiveness from our children. Thank You for sending Your Son, Jesus to be raised by one of us. Jesus' Mother, Mary, was not perfect and still You placed Your Son in her arms. Certainly You had a plan. I believe You also have a plan for my children. Take what I have given them and perfect it in their hearts. Let them see the perfect God through my imperfect life that trusts You!

Monday, May 2, 2011

Enjoy God

I'm back! I've taken a short leave from blogging for a couple of reasons. I have been very busy, and I have also been frustrated with having to deal with HTML codes when posting my blog so they are readable. I have been pleasantly surprised and delighted at how many have mentioned that they miss my blog. Thank you to all who take time to read my ramblings. I always pray they inspire, encourage and maybe even provoke you to draw closer to our Lord.

I am reading John Piper's book, When I Don't Desire God ~ How to Fight for Joy Early in the book he discusses the idea of enjoying God. I put down the book after reading that section and thought about it for days. At the same time Patrick and I were reading our devotion book by Walter Wangerin Jr. about the passion of Christ. Wrapping my thoughts around enjoying God and remembering His passion was not an easy task.

I enjoy watching my Grandchildren. They are a delight to watch. Their smiles make me smile and their efforts at exploring the world amaze me. But what if I could not see their smiles, or hear their babbling? Could I, would I, enjoy them less? I guess I must admit here that I do not have full understanding of how we enjoy God, any more than I understand why I enjoy changing the diapers of my grandchildren. I only know that I love being with them, and I love being close to God.

I don't need to see a miracle, listen to inspiring songs of praise, or even read an amazing passage in the scripture to enjoy God. I only need to take a deep breath, close my eyes and whisper His name. His name makes His presence real to me and I enjoy His fullness.

I believe that we can enjoy God, not because of the blessings He gives, but because He is present in our lives. I know He is. It is good to know God. It is wholly satisfying to know He is. If I lived in a vacuum with nothing but God I could still enjoy him. He is enough!

Oh Great I AM, You are more than enough! You have given more than enough to convince us of Your existence, and yet we struggle to enjoy You. Lord, I know I can enjoy You without all the blessings, but somehow, it seems easier when You do intervene in my life. In fact it makes the enjoyment greater! Thank You for giving more than Your existence. Thank You for allowing me to enjoy the blessings. Lord, teach me to look beyond the blessings and see You. Let me enjoy You above all else!