Monday, June 30, 2008

Broken Pieces

I see broken pieces deep within myself. People close to me have said it can't be true but it is. I not only feel broken, but I am broken. I carry with me broken thoughts, broken emotions, broken health, and broken dreams. As I age, I find more and more that I am broken beyond repair.

This is not to say that I am finished and useless, but only states a fact that is true of how my life is. My broken thoughts, emotions, dreams and health are scars from my sin. I have often moved away from God and His goodness and walked the dangerous path where sin has cracked, bruised and crushed me. It has never been Gods' desire that I should be broken, but He does make my brokenness work to my greater good. You see, He has filled my Spirit with His Holy Spirit and His life. As my shell breaks, He is spilled out and I am renewed and set free to live in Him!

I know it is true that when I am weak He is strong! May I never wander far from His broken heart, the heart I broke when I wanted to do things my way! I want to be free in Him and be safe within the boundaries of His love!

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Brokenness and Freedom

Can brokenness lead to freedom? I do not know, yet. Maybe I will find out.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Good and Bad Choices

It is usually in hindsight that we can determine if our choices were good or bad. Ok, so some of our choices we know are bad from the start. With all the health info, could we ever believe that smoking, being a couch potato, indulging in too much sugar, or eating fatty foods loaded with cholestrol is a good choice for our bodies? Many of us take those chances and make the bad choice to indulge our selfish desires.

Selfishness is nearly always the motivation for making bad choices. We pretend that it won't harm us or we want to be part of a crowd and since it is fun for the moment we choose to take part in the activities that will send ripples of problems our way. The question is, how can we ever make good choices if we are so selfish in our nature? We are selfish. We think about what is the most fun or most comfortable thing to do in any given moment. The answer is to find someone stronger than ourselves to take over our choices. Is that where God comes in? Maybe. At first it is most likely our parents who choose for us. Then we enter a stage where we decide to choose for ourselves. It is only after we make a disaster of our lives that we turn to God and ask Him to help us in the choices we make.

Choice is not having total freedom. Choice will bring us to the bondage of trouble or to the boundaries of freedom.

Friday, June 27, 2008


Each morning I awaken to a day that will be filled with choices I seldom think much about. I choose what to eat, how to exercise my body and what tasks on my "to do" list will be done first. I make choices based on habit as much as a mindful decision like making the bed, brushing my teeth, reading my bible. Reading my bible is a habit? Whoa!

I guess bible reading is a good habit to acquire, but if the words also run through my mind in a habitual form, I surely am not building my relationship with my Heavenly Father, my friend and Savior Jesus, nor my wise guardian Holy Spirit. The best choice is for me to read with the intent to communicate with the One who speaks these words into being. Like St. Augustine said, The Word not only reveals God to me but also reveals who I am in His light. This choice is the only choice I know that brings true change in my life.

Because I believe this, I make a habit of not making a habit of my time with God. I spend time with Him in different places: my bedroom, my couch, my computer room. I use different mediums, the bible and other books, praise tapes and song, internet devotions, and radio and tv programs. Times are varied also: sometimes, late at night and other times in the mid part of my day. In all these ways I listen for His voice. He speaks to me of the truth for which I am searching.

My choice is deeper than the mechanics of my time with my Saving God. I choose to know Him and understand Him so I can fully trust and love Him in all the other choices of my life.

Thursday, June 26, 2008


Today begins our firework tent sale. You cannot imagine the hard work that goes into putting out the packages, and set up all the safety needs. My body aches from head to toe!

Is all of the effort worth it? Well, sometimes it is and yet, sometimes I do wonder even though we can vacation with the money earned. The people are wonderful and the patriotic excitement gives me hope for our country. But then I do worry about those who misuse the fireworks and get hurt, sometimes seriously injuring themselves or others.

Please be careful if you use fireworks. Take the time to read the safety materials and be prepared with water buckets and / or hoses. My prayers are always with each of you who celebrate with fireworks, but it never hurts to use common sense!

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Power Words

There are times when I choose my words very carefully. Other times I throw out whatever my mind is thinking. Seldom do I realize the power of my words until long after they were said or written.

Some times the effect of our words can be funny, like when I mispronounce a word or use words that others do not understand. That actually happened to me as a new bride (although it was my husbands word that was misunderstood). I would fix dinner and ask him how it was. He almost always said "Pretty good." He did not use it as an exclamation so I considered it to be only an average meal. So , the next night I would try harder with the same resulting evaluation. I began to feel hurt. I also felt guilty for not being able to please him. It wasn't until I asked where his "Pretty good" fell on a scale of 1 to 10 that I found out his "Pretty good" was my "Excellent!" His words had power over me and my unspoken words also held power over our relationship.

There are other times when my words have been offered with the best of intentions but with harsh consequences. Last Thanksgiving I was busy taking picture of family in various groupings. I called my sister, her husband and my sisters children over for a picture, not knowing that not including my brother-in-laws adult children in this particular picture would create a deep wedge in our relationship. Months later I learned through the grape vine that his avoidance of me was because of that one picture. Though I had next called the rest of the family together the damage was already done. I apologized and we are now back to being buddies. He did not realize what my true intentions were. My words and actions were not intended to hurt. But they did.

I expect power from my words when I pray over and think through them as when I write a letter, article, or poem. Disappointment can seep into my soul when these heartfelt words bring no reaction or just a cursory "How nice." I can also be surprised and taken back when the power of my communication results in an outburst from the other person. The truth communicated is not meant to cause harm or set in motion a tidal wave of events that pour out trouble and confusion and guilt. It is these times, when my heavily mined words are not treasured or looked upon as valuable for understanding, that I consider holding back in the future.

To close off my thoughts from others is dishonest. No, I am not one who speaks out every thought in my head, or insists that people hear and agree with me on every point, but I do like to be allowed my opinion, just like everyone does. If I stay silent, others will think I agree with them even if I don't. If I stay silent I am also not being true to myself. The truth is I must speak out with understanding caution and in love.

When I speak out, I must understand that people may misunderstand my intentions and/or what I've tried to say. I must try to be cautious in laying everything on the line knowing that there may be a ripple that will last a long time if not forever. Of course there should always be hope that the ripple will draw the listeners and those affected to a better place. Above all I should have love in my heart so that the words of truth are spoken in love and for the best of the hearer. This does not mean that the words can't sting or that the listener will perceive the love behind the words, but my heart will be right before God, who knows my intentions.

Above all, the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart should be pleasing to my Lord and my God. With that in proper order, I am free to speak for that is what I have been called to do.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008


Do you have a favorite color? Maybe you choose colors depending on your mood like I do. There are days that are bright and need a yellow top for my outfit, but then other days need my blue or green tops to match my serene or "Blue" mood. I guess it says alot about me that I don't wear black. Never seem to get that depressed!

I love colors! They speak to me about spiritual things, emotions and beauty. Without color my life would be dull. So, today I thank God for letting so many colors and shades and tints be available for me to see, wear, and enjoy.

I don't just mean the colors of the rainbow either. I delight in the various shades of skin colors. I am sometimes awed to see the spectrum of color in which we humans blossom. We are certainly a beautiful garden of color! Reds, yellows, whites, browns, golds, tans, and blacks and everything in between. Our skin, hair and eyes are a mini garden of color that blend with others who grow near us.

Even our personalities shine through with color images. We may be the power red, or the cheery yellow, or the melencholy blues or shrinking violets. All in all God must love color too.

There is beauty in us and around us. I want to allow the Creator of my colors to shine through all I am and do! So, do you have some favorite colors too?

Monday, June 23, 2008

My Son a Daddy

When he was little he loved to play with dolls. He never played as if he were a Mom , but played the roll of a Daddy for his sisters dollys. He also played with cars and loved baseball. He has always been a tough and tender man.

There were friends and family members who thought it strange that I would let my son play with dolls, but I saw him practicing for the day he would become a Father. Being a Father is a tough balancing job. A man needs to be tender and gentle but also tough and strong. I am so proud to see my son filling the role of Daddy with sure hands and a certain heart.

I watch him care, protect, play, and provide for both his wife and son. He does not shirk from diaper changes or late night feedings. He wears his pride in his smile and offers words of comfort. All of these I saw many years ago as he played Daddy to the dolls his sisters owned. My son is a Daddy whose heart beats strong in the role. I love watching him be the man that God prepared him to be! I am proud of my son the Dad!

My prayer is that he will also step up into the role of a spiritual guide for his son. He may already have done so but I have not seen this side of his fathering. He already is an example for his son to follow. His prayers, teachings, and blessings will be a strength and guide as well.

My grandson is already blessed. He is rich in love.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Sun Queen

Bright yellow
splattered on a delightfully blue canvass
stretching as far as the eye can see.

I like it best
~when the sun does not
blaze across the sky
crowding out the deepness of the blue and
beating down on the helpless earth
like a tyrant commanding attention and
invading the universe;
~when the suns' heat does not
weigh heavy on my shoulders,
stifle my breath,
closes my eyes and
pushes me to lie down and sleep.
~when the sky is wide and free
and I feel as if I could
rise up and fly,
soaring and playing in the air;
~when the sun reigns with mercy,
allowing the sky to compliment her beauty
and the white puffy clouds to dance
in her presence and
a soft cool breeze is allowed to
brush the earth with blessing
as it sings a soft melody
to refresh and uplift my heart.

(c) 2008

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Quiet blessings

This morning I left the house at 6:50 am. Yes, it is Saturday, but not my sleep in day! I attend a bible study at 7:00 am at my church and I am thankful that I do not have far to drive.

My Saturday mornings are always a bit rushed because I wake up just in time to get dressed, brush my teeth and grab my mug and bible books. Today as I rushed out the door I was slowed by an awesome and holy presence. All was silent except for a choir of birds singing in harmony as the sun rose gently into the sky. Peace flooded my soul and I entered into the presence of the King of kings and Lord of lords.

It is a beautiful way to start a day, but for some lazy reason, I won't greet every day in the silence of the majestic cathedral of Gods' creation. I usually wait until the rustling of my early bird granddaughters and their early morning cartoons pierce through my dreams and demand my arousal. Oh what I miss!

Maybe tomorrow I'll find a spot to visit with my Father the King. Maybe I'll change the "maybe" into an "I will!" Would you like to join us? You are invited.

Friday, June 20, 2008


How did you celebrate the first day of summer? Did you even know that today is the summer equinox?

Every morning I do a devotion time with my two curious granddaughters. It is always fun to share a little bit about the world with them, so today I announced the begining of Summer and pronounced it official. They widened their eyes and looked astonished because they have been out of school for two weeks now. They believed that their summer began the day they got out of school, but it didn't.

Summer is usually associated with vacations and trips to the beach. Summer reading programs at the library and Vacation Bible Schools keep kids and parents busy. For me, summer is warm outside and cold inside. I wear sweaters to the store because store owners seem to want to bring Jack Frost back to town. I go outside to warm my toes and nose from the artificail arctic blasts of the air conditioners. Watermelon, icy cold drinks, and light dinners give me a lift in summer. It isn't that I go on a diet during the summer, but it is too hot or I'm too busy to chow down a big meal. Summer, even here in Florida, brings a change that tells my inner clock to slow down, relax, and enjoy Gods' blossoming world. So, I always seem to reach for a good book.

Summer books are a different kind of reading than winter books. I tend to look for a tale of epic proportions, one that can't be put down easily. I love books that let me escape. My summer reading choices are ones that bring to life characters and places that truly transport me away from the every day. I choose to become one or more of the characters and live out their adventures in my imagination.

In the past I have become well acquainted with the historical fiction of Eugenia Price. Her Savannah books took me back to the old south and I struggled through issues of slavery and civil war. I hated, and yet loved, learning about the superior mindset that gave the white slaveholders an excuse for owning people as their property. I faced my pride and my judgemental spirit. I was changed.

This summer I have been given the book, The Shack, by William P. Young. I will read it, but then I intend to go back to the Black, Red, and White trilogy by Ted Dekker for the third summer. I can't explain its fascination, I only know I want to be with those characters and in that time and place. I continue to learn from the experiences and thoughts of the characters who journey between worlds. No "Why" is explained for this journey, but there is much to learn about myself within these pages. Maybe next year I'll be invited into a different fantasy. Careful selection will be the key to good summer reading that will change me into better person. I think I'll go read and get my granddaughters to sit down with me with their books.

What do you like to read? Do you read differently in the summer? Share a good book and don't forget to read THE Good Book! Now, that is a book that will change you!

Thursday, June 19, 2008


Justice is symbolized by scales. The scales of justice are seen as being even with each other. This represents that the punishment for a crime would be even with the crime itself. Sadly, our justice system falls far short of this representation or ideal.

Do murderers, rapists, and drug dealers get their due when they are sentenced a few short years, only to be paroled before those years are served? Is the punishment really fitting the crime? We may think that we are being humane when we lighten their sentence or allow them second chances, but is it justice or a simple band-aid on the problem of violent crime?

I can honestly say that I stand in the middle of the road as far as the death penalty. My heart is saddened by the idea of taking a life even when it is administered by government. On the other hand, there are people who are so totally evil in their thinking that the only solution to ridding society of their scourge is to pronounce and follow through on their execution. Then there is always the hope of redemption. How long do we wait to hear that they have repented? How long do we wait for them to have a change of heart? There is not a clear dividing line and perhaps we must leave that up to God and simply pronounce judgement that is due the offence.

How should we handle the "lesser" crimes that do not involve violence against a person, but cause misery for others because of loss of money or possessions? Do prison terms really make the scales even? Shouldn't the one who steals or destroys anothers property be made to pay back? How can this be done when he/she is incarcerated? Why should these crimes be for the same length of time as many of the violent crimes?

Our justice system is wrought with people who desire power over others, who crave revenge or the satisfaction of watching others hurt. Maybe they have a sense that they are better than others. Whatever the reason, we all do it to one another. We recognize the sin in others because we also are infected with sin. We know it must be punished and yet we want to avoid it for ourselves. So, we are ready and willing to punish others, making sure they pay a high price for their sin no matter how miniscule or severe.

Sin does have a high price. The sin of Adam and Eve was a sin of disobedience. It could be considered minor in comparison to murder, yet it was still sin and demanded a high price for redemption. That price was the life of Jesus, the Son of God. In our minds Gods' justice might look uneven, but God is a just judge. Adam and Eve knew that the sin of disobedience would bring death. and God served that justice on His Son.

Our first parents could have chosen life. There was a tree of life in the garden that God wanted them to eat. Unfortunately, Man chose death through the knowledge of good and evil. Since that time we continue to choose death every time we sin. Gods' justice in our lives can only be satisfied through Jesus' death. Gods' justice is perfect because He is perfect. He demanded a life for our sin and then gave the life of His Son. Our justice, however, is flawed because we are flawed. We demand a payment for crime based on our own needs. We demand too little or too much.

We could do much better with our justice meted out through our courts. We could even up the scales, but even if we fail there is the Judge over all who will judge in righteousness and love. He will judge each of us perfectly. I want to have His judgement over my sins already paid for because it is a high price. Jesus has already paid it, why should I turn His offer down?

Think about it: If you need someone to pay the price of your sin wouldn't you want Jesus to do it? Don't wait!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Random thoughts

My husband and I are planning to visit our Moms in Colorado this summer. I've been looking forward to it until lately. I guess you could say I am afraid of seeing my mom as she declines in years. Don't get me wrong, she is very healthy physically, but she seems to be having some mental issues according to my sister who lives near her and watches over her for all of us who are away. I don't want to see my Mom struggle. What ever I find when I see her, I pray it won't be as bad as my mind is conjuring. I want my visit to be pleasant and filled with great memories.

I've parented my four children and have also been an integral part of parenting five others, not to mention all the advice I have given to young Moms along the way. I actually have a degree in child development and family relationships. Though I've made mistakes, I think we did a good job as parents. Lately, I have felt judged as far below what I think I am. I guess there is pride involved. My children are not perfect. They try to live Godly lives, but like everyone they fall short. For the most part they learn from their mistakes and accept the consequences with courage. They also know that when they fail they can return to Jesus for forgiveness and that is what makes them good Christians, not perfection. I am proud of my family!

Babies need alot of love. They can never get enoughof the tender loving touches that help them grow. In my opinion I believe that everytime a baby cries they should be attended to. It builds trust between the child and the parent/caregiver. When a baby, who is not able to do for themselves, is left to cry it out they learn that they are unimportant and that they cannot trust those who can supply their need. Of course this should not last forever. There does come a time when the parent/caregiver recognizes that the baby is pulling strings to stay lazy and not responsible for his/her own needs. The age may vary but it usually comes around the age of six months in my opinion. You may think I am a supporter of spoiling a child, but I like what I read somewhere that "Spoiling is doing for your child what they cannot do for themselves." So it doesn't hurt to hold your baby and let them sleep in your arms if you want to! Just remember that someday it will have to end!

As my family has grown and we have added new people into our lives and grandbabies are coming along, I am feeling like I am looking in at them all through a window. I wonder why and how I can get back inside to enjoy the closeness. It isn't that I am excluded from activities or gatherings, but even in the middle of it all I somehow seem to be on the fringe. I can't seem to join in a conversation except for short little agreements or disagreements of what is being talked about. I feel as if my thoughts are out of place and maybe "old-fashioned" and no one wants to hear them. so I sit and listen and enjoy the fun that others are having. It makes me feel old. I really don't feel old on the inside. I know I have experiences and wisdom and stories to share, but when sharing them brings comments, rolled eyes, and snickers I guess it makes me rethink my place. Maybe I do need to be on the outside on the front porch. Maybe someday someone will come and sit with me and listen to my stories. Till then I will listen to theirs!

Random thoughts are now settled. They no longer need to float around my head and keep me occupied. Journaling is good for that purpose! Maybe you need to write something down too.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

My Daughters' Birthday

My first child was born 34 years ago. Being my first child she became an experiment in parenting for both me and my husband. It has been an awesome experiment that God has let me take part in! He trusted me with this child, and though I made many mistakes (not only with her but all of my children) God helped out. Because of His helping hand in her life she has become a powerful woman of faith!

My daughter is walking a hard path not of her choosing. She has walked it for six years now, and through it all she has held fast to the source of her strength. She has proven herself to be faithful, strong, resourceful, loving, encouraging and steadfast in faith her trust in God. I am so very proud of her!

She has joy that is irrepressible! Since she turned 16 she has celebrated "The Week of Erin" not just her birth"day". The entire week surrounding her birthday is filled with little celebrations of friendships, family, and herself. Maybe she wanted to make sure she got her weeklong celebration so she could surpass Fathers' Day since her birthday sometimes lands on that day, and she is forced to share the day with her Dad. Whatever the reason, it always brings us who love her much joy to watch her delight in life and the good that God has blessed her with!

So, Erin Joy, have a wonderful Week and a delightful Day of celebrating You! I believe God is delighting in sharing you with the world!

To everyone else who reads this, take a moment and celebrate life! It is worth celebrating!

Monday, June 16, 2008

Neighbors and friends

Eggs, milk, oil, spices and even tapioca are some of the things I have borrowed from my neighbor or she has borrowed or tried to borrow from me! We depend on one another for collecting mail when we are out of town and sometimes for minor sewing jobs. We are always certain we can count on the other to lift up prayers for our trials and struggles in life. Though Harriet is old enough to be my Mom, I consider her a friend, a really good dependable friend.

I have friends of all ages. Carol is a friend who is in between the Mom age and the older sister age. She is a great encouragement and source of wisdom as I follow her in the experiences life throws our way. Ginger is my age. We have many things in common, including the busy lives we lead that keep us from enjoying each others company as often as we would like. Then there is my "Baby" sister M.E. She has become an accountability partner and spiritual friend in a special and unique bond that we have. Then I claim my daughters, Erin and Briget and my daughter-in-law, Laura, as friends. Our friendship is new because it has changed from me being an authority in their lives to me being a friend to enjoy life with them. Finally, I am reaching out in friendship to my niece, Christyna. She is a young woman who is open to the friendship of an old lady who has stories to tell. Each of my friends are "neighbors" who come along side of me to live life together.

I love having friends of all ages. When I say friends, I really mean that it is a give and take relationship that we both desire and enjoy. I think we miss out when we keep our friendships limited to our own age group. It creates a wall that limits our perspectives and our ability to learn from the mistakes of others. If our true friendships only involve those who are walking in the same time zone as ourselves, it says that we never have to change.

Of course there is plenty that is offered through friendships that is not meant for me to change. That is when I need my friend Jesus to make the choices clear.But, what better way then to walk with a friend as I find it out?

Today, I am thanking God for being my friend and sending wisened and fresh view-pointed friends to make my life better and filled with the joy of living! Maybe you have a neighbor who would also make a good friend. all you can do is try! It is worth the effort!

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Father of My Children

I am most proud to stand beside the Father of my children. He is a handsom man but that alone could not make me stand beside him with honor.

Patrick is a man who is honest, kind, loving and gentle. He has always been an encouragement to me and so many others. He has a heart that feels deeply the needs of those who hurt. He gives to others even when it causes him discomfort, and comfort is something he really likes!

I have not known many husbands who have sacrificed so much to help their wives achieve their dreams. My man has offered many sacrifices of time, money and even warm comforts to see me reach my dreams. He has generously taken into our home those who have no place to go. He is a man who prays for the needs of others, knowing that the prayers of a righteous man avails much. My man has a huge heart.

Patricks heart holds his past, present, and future with tenderness and as priceless treasures to be enjoyed. He brings interest into our lives through intelligent conversation, expanding my friendships and challenges that stretch me in directions I never thought I would go. There is abundant life with him by my side!

My man is my friend and lover, my delight and blessing, my touch from God. More than these, he is a Dad who finds joy in watching his children live life. He is their strength when things go wrong. He is a father who has provided, loved, and instructed his children by example!

This man of mine, my childrens' Dad, is honored today for giving the best of himself even when it has been hard. Thanks, Hon. May God grant you the satisfaction of seeing your dreams fulfilled.

Happy Fathers' Day!

Saturday, June 14, 2008

My Dad

Since tomorrow is Fathers' Day I thought I'd write about my Dad. I haven't written about him since he passed away 11 years ago. At that time I wrote a eulogy for him but I was unable to return for his funeral so I just sent it for the family to read.

It is always nice to think about someone you love, even if you miss them. I think that the sweet memories of my Dad help me to remember the blessing of having him in my life. No, he wasn't perfect. He failed me in many ways. But, then there were those special times that he poured a little bit into my life that remains a part of me.

He was an artist at heart. He and mom together brought color and visual delights into our home. Most were of the crafty sort that brought a homey "touch me " feel to the world of visual pleasures. Dad liked to draw, paint and build. My most precious memories involve his window and floor paintings. He told me once that he had brought home a string of old Christmas lights he had found in the dump near his childhood home so that he could decorate his Christmas tree. What sort of man does that if he is not an artist at heart?

Dad was also a teacher. I don't mean the school type of teacher but a teacher of practical and interesting tidbits. He taught me about cars, baseball, and puzzles. He would peruse the encyclopedia to find an article and then he would call us over to read to us. To this day I love to read to my family about the things I learn. Dad and mom taught all of us to love learning and that it is a lifelong adventure.

If I could talk to Dad again I don't think I would talk about the weather, though he loved to do that. I think I would prefer asking him questions about his life, his beliefs, his lost dreams and lost loves. I would want to listen to his voice and hear him again tell me to "Come home!"

I guess the things I loved the most about my Dad are the things I saw in him that are so like my Heavenly Father. He, too, is an artist who surprises me with sky paintings and earthy sculptures full of color and shape. God teaches me about so many things in the world and about people and especially about myself. And I know that someday My waiting Fathers will call me home to be with them.

Fathers' Day is a Day to celebrate the wise and good blessing of the Men who have made a difference in our lives. Whoever they may be, grandfathers, fathers, uncles or friends, they, and God deserve our thanks!

Thanks Daddy! Thank You, Lord!

Friday, June 13, 2008


Rejection hurts, stings and can be seared into our memories for a very long time. There are times when a rejection happens unintentionally, but none the less it still hurts. Rejection seems to whisper a host of accusations to us that may or may not be true.

I usually hear that I am not good enough, and then it digs deeper to reinforce my long held fears of never being worth anything important. But, there are times that I turn my hurt around toward the person who has rejected my love, talents, or friendship. It is those times I am most hurt by rejection because it is then that I become the one who hurts. I may not be hurt by my words or actions towards them, but the thoughts that pour poison into my heart and harden it towards others becomes a spiritual hurt that weakens me. A hard heart is in danger of losing a godly perspective of the world and the people God so loved that He sent His only Son.

A hard heart is unforgiving, jealous, critical, prideful and judgmental. A hard heart builds up stone walls to keep out pain, but also becomes a prison that keeps me from experiencing God. Over time a hard heart becomes so entrenched that in order to soften it must be broken. Brokenness brings me to my knees and to the One who was broken for me!

The conclusion I come to is that I must go directly from rejection to my knees to hear His voice say, "If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated Me first." John 15:18. He alone truly understands and can keep my heart filled with grace to forgive! In this way I can avoid the hardening of my heart.

Friends, may you never feel the heaviness of a hardened heart from rejection. May you know the freedom of a heart tender toward God and others.

Be blessed.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Captivated Women

This Saturday our women's Ministry is having a half day retreat called Summer Lite. I will be one of the speakers for the break out groups. The theme of the day is finding Peace in.... Where do we find peace?

Do we find peace in forgiveness? crafts? Is there peace in our homes? There isn't much peace in our world. Which is more important, peace in our hearts or peace in the world? Peace: we fight for it and we seek after many things that promise peace but it so often eludes us.

I've been listening to Beth Moore on Wednesdays when she teaches a short study for Life Today with James Robison. She has been teaching on finding the God of all comfort versus desiring comfort at any cost. I relate comfort and peace together. Do you? It seems to me that more often than not we seek comfort and peace at the same time.

Curling up in bed with a good book, watching a chick flick lounging on the couch, avoiding issues with our loved ones for fear of losing the plastic peace that sits between us, or grabbing that sweet dessert and savoring its comfort. Many things pretend to bring us peace and Beth moore says that when we Desire these comforts more than the God of all comfort we live lives of relational disasters, lives full of addictions, and we will miss our calling because our calling will only be found outside of our comfort zone.

I think Beth is right about comfort, but when I look at it through this window, I must say I am wrong to bind comfort and peace together so securely. Yes, the lack of peace leads to relationship disasters and addictions, but I think we can have peace without having comfort! Even in the most difficult circumstances we can have peace.

Jesus is our Prince of Peace (Is.9:6) Jesus is our peace (Eph.2:14a) and He fills us with the Holy Spirit so we may bear fruit, of which one is peace. The question arises how do we get this peace Jesus offers?

I am certain that the first step is to be captivated by God. We must be overpowered by the desire to seek Him in His word, and to be with Him in relationship throughout each day. It is when we are bound to Christ that we can find peace in any situation. When turmoil is thrust at us and we find ourselves sinking, we know that Jesus is with us. We believe He will get us through the trial and make all things right in the end as He promised. Of course we don't know when the end will be, but we really can trust Him. He has proven Himself to be faithful. He has proven Himself to be my Prince of Peace.

For you I pray that He will fill your hearts with peace that passes understanding. May You always know the peace He offers and refuse plastic peace. I also hope and pray that you will find comfort in Him alone!

Have a great day!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008


Holding him in my arms was such a delight today! Seeing how he has grown and changed made me see the hand of our Creator God.

Scott was born prematurely and weighed only 3lbs.10 oz. at birth. Each time I see him I am amazed at how he has grown and changed. He should not yet be born yet and yet he is so perfectly formed. Yes, he is tiny and thin and needs lots of sleep and eats in small amounts, but he is growing his way toward a newborn normal!

My sons' son. What an amazing and delightful blessing that is! This tiny soul is part of me. I am blessed to be his "Grommers", someone to love him and enjoy his life! His hair is so soft, his tiny fingers and toes are so sweet and so amazingly small! his tiny face captures my heart and I watch intently the furrows of his brow or the crooked smile and peek-a-boo eyes. I could hold him for hors! His life! A life just begining to experience the world in all its joys and pains. I pray for him and his parents and for me!

May our Heavenly Father give Scott long life filled with blessings. May Scott know Jesus early and never grow tired of serving Him. May his parents and myself and all others who will influence him teach him wisely in the ways of the One who made Him and purposed for him to be born at this time.

Scott I hope you will always remember that Grommers loves you and Jesus loves you too!

For you who read this, may you find life a blessing and live it in abundance with Christ Jesus!

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Lifting up a friend

Sometimes it is so hard to find the right words for a friend who is down and needs some cheer. Do I share the good things that are happening to me or do I tell them my troubles? In my experience talking about myself rarely helps them. My woes mean nothing against their own heart aches. My smiles don't tear down the dark curtain surrounding them. So what do I do?

When I connect with God, even while they are speaking or crying, I find help. Gods' voice can comfort me when I see my loved one hurting and I have no power to change thier circumstances. His words give me wisdom as to when to be silent and when to speak. His tender mercies also can speak into their lives when a sure word comes to me for them. So why do I feel the need to tell my stories when they are hurting or need me to be their connection to the One who really has the answers for them?

Well, simply put, it is pride and selfishness. I want my life stories to be more important than theirs. Lord let me lay down my life before You. Let the importance of my life be in Your hands. Then help me to listen to my friend and listen to Your voice lead us closer to each other and to You. Near Your heart is the only place we need to be.Thank You for Your open arms, Your merciful heart and the place where our tears are collected and purified to make all work for our good because we love You.

May You, too, find comfort in The Perfect Friend, Jesus.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Summer Vacation with the Grands

Today begins a summer of kids around the house all day long. Yikes! What will I accomplish with them running in and out and needing this or that? Probably less than I want or should.

So today I am fighting their dragging feet to get them moving and on some sort of schedule that I can work with. Maybe it is me who needs to be on a schedule!

So today I need patience with them and with my circumstances. I choose to be positive and believe we can start out on the right foot and at least begin this journey in step with each other!

This reminds me of how my Heavenly Father must want me to get in step with Him. Many days He sits patiently waiting for me to come to His side and walk in step with Him. Today I pray that His walk will be my first priority. Then I may get much more accomplished. Maybe my granddaugthers will come with me and they will get to know Him better.

Time to exercise my spirit in the Word and then exercise my body and generate some intrest in play time for the girls. For you, I hope you too have a day in step with your Creator. He waits patiently.

Blessings to you,

Sunday, June 8, 2008

New Beginings

New beginings, graduations, new grandson, new ideas, new blog. Each moment is a new beginging and yet I chose to single out certain begingings as special and worthy of celebration. Here is a few I have celebrated lately:
Scott William is my new grandson born May 15.
My nephew Jon graduated from high school.
I am planning a new endeavor. I'll tell you more in another blog.
Summer vacation is here.
My granddaughter, Brooke, has graduated to First Grade.
My granddaughter,Paige, has graduated to Third Grade.
I am begining this blog to further get career moving forward.

Welcome to all visitors! May you be blessed. May you too celebrate the new begining that God has afforded you through this moment in time. Life is precious! Celebrate now!