Thursday, January 13, 2011

Decision

As the time ends for a chapter in our life, I look back and wonder if we made the wrong decision. Was our charity and sticking to our word as wrong as others have said? I ponder all the years, and I have no regrets, though there were some very difficult times. The day is drawing near to when the commitment is over. It is time to move on.

Our daughter and grandladies have lived with us for 9 years. Now that they are moving I am rethinking my very stubborn stand to see our promise stand true to the end. We've experienced the frustrations and irritations of having them around, but we gave our word and we would see it through. We have also had the most wonderful times with our Grandladies as they have grown. Those treasured moments are far more valuable than our own pleasures.

The decision to give them a home has been criticized by most everyone we know. I feel very alone in believing this was the right thing to do. My prayers over the years never drew us away from the decision we made. Did I not hear God? Did I shut my ears to His direction? It is possible, but it will be a judgement made by the righteous judge, not by me or anyone else. But I still wonder. My heart was and is right and steadfast, I am not sure that others see that. I would have followed if my husband had been determined to send them away. I am so glad we worked through it together.

This weekend they will move as a family to a place where I pray they will be safe, find peace, and blessings abundant. I am happy for them even if a part of me is sad. I will miss my Grandladies. I hope they will remember that we have given them the treasure of our hearts. We have shown them the importance of living for Jesus. At least I hope that is what we did.

Father, You love like no other! You know my heart and my thoughts. You know if we did right or wrong in our decision. The time has come for the end and I am happy and sad all at once. Help me to set my eyes on You and Your plan just as I have these past years. Thank You for giving me what I have always wanted: being close to my children and grandchildren. You are so good and I know that even if our decision was wrong, You have promised that because we love You, You will make it all work out for our good. Thank You.

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