Yesterday was my Daughters' anniversary. Briget and Jimmy have been married for two years now. They are working through the challenges of molding their lives into one. It has not been easy, but they are still loving each other through the tough times. I am proud of them.
When I talk to newly weds now-a-days, I find their ideas of marriage are so much different than mine. They are eager to work together, but they also insist that their spouse change for them. Did I think that way when I was newly married? Yes, I must say I did. Thirty five and a half years has taught me differently. No matter how hard I try, Patrick will not always think or act like I want. He is a man. The differences between men and women go much deeper than just teaching each other how to behave. Our differences are who we are.
The questions that run through my mind today are: Why do we focus on making our spouse a carbon copy of ourselves? Wouldn't it be better to celebrate, explore, use and delight each others unique qualities? I think that with 35+ successful years of marriage we have some wisdom to offer young couples, so why don't they want to listen?
Young couples would be wise to find an older mentor couple to help them through their tough times. Maybe not family, but someone they can look to for sound healthy Godly advice.
Father, You brought Adam and Eve together and designed the relationship of marriage for them and for us. Thank You for making men and women differently. We can learn so much more about You through our differences! Help us to grow closer to one another in love. Bless the young couples I know and give them grace to find their unique relationship style in Your plan!