A week or so ago, I wrote an email to a friend. I had mixed motives in writing the email, and was not completely honest with her. Since then I have been convicted by the Holy Spirit to ask for forgiveness.
I've been slow in asking for forgiveness because my heart had not changed and I needed to deal with my bad attitude before sending off another email with mixed motives. This morning was my day to humble myself, seek forgiveness, be honest even if it meant being vulnerable, and clear my conscience before God!
What a relief! I have not heard back from my friend and she may not accept my apology. She may either say there was nothing to apologize for, but I know that if the Holy Spirit leads me in that direction, He knows their true heart. She may allow herself to express anger towards me that was held back because of the veiled messages I sent. In either case I am free from the sin because I have God's forgiveness and have obeyed Him in doing the right thing to clear the mess I made with my words.
Father, You are so gracious and kind to wipe away my sin! You are my peace, You are my Lord! You are holy and I am to be holy! You are wise in all You do! I need You to guide me, teach me, reprimand me and forgive me! Thank You for being all I need and for helping me through the really tough times like asking forgiveness. I want to be transparent. i want others to see my flaws and most importantly to see You working in me! Keep me under Your wing and never let me stray far from Your side!